Morning Yearning
by love-r-of-Jam
Summary: After Lorelai gives up after Luke turns down her ultimatum, Luke realizes what a fool he is, and includes the town to change her mind.


Morning Yearning

Disclaimer: Own none of it. Not the names or places, and I don't own the song either. Ben Harper does. If you don't like it, take it up with him.

Summary: When Lorelai finally gives up on Luke, Luke engages the whole town to help him get back Lorelei.

AN: this was supposed to be fluff. And it's not. It's angsty and melodramatic to the core. But I love it. Hope you do too! Let's hope that there are fluffy happily ever after next year!

Rating: Teen.

Lorelai Gilmore woke up with a start. She had been in Christopher's bed only momentarily, and now she saw that she was in her own bed. Paul Anka was moaning in his sleep. She sighed and got up to try to excise the dream out of her system. She kept on having that dream that she went to Christopher. Even the thought of going to Christopher left a sour taste in her mouth.

Christopher wasn't the sort of person you went to when you were upset or in need. He could provide money, but there was no sense of comfort from him. She figured that long ago.

She had almost gotten rid of every hint of Luke, without tearing the house down. She had walked away after he had rejected her once again, and she just didn't have the heart to try again.

She sighed as she went back upstairs and laid in her bed eyes open. She wished that she hadn't been so impatient. Just because Anna said that she wouldn't be allowed near April until she had a 'real' relationship with Luke, didn't mean that it needed to be now, that very second.

She had been childish hiding from Luke. She just wanted to escape, and not live her life through a fake rose tinted glass anymore. She could see herself as a cat woman. Alone and crazy, surrounded by 'her' things and telling anyone who would listen about she once had a great love.

Lorelai fell asleep and wondered if she would ever be able to move on.

Luke sat in his bachelor apartment and laughed at how funny his life was. He had been alone and not quite content, but he figured he could live his life like that. But now, after living with Lorelai for a few months, and loving her, and knowing what it was like, to be loved back by her. Even one second alone, made him feel well lonely.

Now, he wondered if she would ever even talk to him again. Whenever they had a fight before, Lorelai always disappeared from his life. The fight about jess had made a whole summer of silence for him. When she had found out he had moved in with Nicole, she had been so jealous and angry that she hadn't spoken to him for days. And when she was forced to be near him, the anger in her eyes, made it quite clear how she felt about him.

When they broke up, she had been virtually invisible to him, even though he longed to have one glance of her. Hell, he had built all the stuff in the stupid 'Fiddler on the Roof' play, because Lorelai was supposed to be involved.

And now, he doubted if he would see her for at least a month. He had done what he promised he would never do. He had rejected her and now he regretted it. It was just she was acting crazy, irrational. Lorelai wasn't an ultimatum type of person.

She had been given quite enough of them in her life, she had told him. From her mother, and other people trying to manipulate her. So why would she resort to giving him one now? He tried to think of the last time he felt really secure in his relationship with Lorelai. Maybe the night of his engagement. When they had celebrated their engagement with Zima and the stars.

Then there was the turmoil of Rory and Lorelei's brutal fight, and then his own horrible discovery. He had a child. Not that April was anything but wonderful and amazing, but the way he found out. That was something he would never guess would ever happen to him. It was the kind of thing that happened to other people. To fictional characters that he scoffed at when he saw the harlequin books he saw in the pharmacy. The ones with horrible ridiculous names like 'His secret child.' Or to soap opera characters he pretended didn't exist.

And now he didn't think things could be fixed. He wished he could sleep beside her like he did that night, when she had proposed. Maybe things would have been different, if Lorelei hadn't taken caution to the wind that night. If he had proposed at a later date. Perhaps after he had met April, then things would be so much better.

If only he had included Lorelei more, told her he loved her more, if he had kissed her more, hugged her, even stopped bugging her about going to her parent's dinners. Maybe things would be different.

Suddenly he felt ridiculous. Thinking of all the things he could have done differently. He was unfortunately, the type of man that thought back on things with regret, and he had been trying to change that. No longer would he be loner Luke Danes. He wanted to be 'that family man Luke Danes.' 'Luke Danes at his son's baseball game.' And even 'Luke Danes celebrating his golden anniversary with his love Lorelai' Luke Danes. And evenly sadly, 'Luke Danes died surrounded by family and friends.' Something that had to happen.

He looked at the ring box that Lorelai had sent Rory over with. With a note. 'You should have this back.' No sign of what Lorelei was feeling. Suddenly he felt like some great injustice had been put upon him. He would have to fix that. His father had taught him that if something was broken, the decent and good thing to do was to fix it.

So he began to plan. He couldn't just propose again, that would be rather inconsiderate, and it wouldn't fix anything. He knew a lot of her hurt came from his hiding April, so he could introduce Lorelai to April again. But they had already met, and bonded at that birthday party.

He could try to make up for his mistakes, relish her with his attention and love, Try to make that glint of pain in her eyes disappear. He thought of great gestures, or small gestures. He thought of thousands of flowers, and one simple petal. Of a horse drawn carriage and his simple green truck.

He thought of pounding down her door, and simply knocking. Of rushing to her and making love to her or simply kissing her. To beg her for forgiveness or to just wait for her to come to him.

All he knew was that if he had to make a choice between fixing things and being with Lorelai, or preserving his pride and living his life alone, the latter was something that would really break his heart.

On the first day after the big disappointment, Lorelai got three packages of coffee left on her door. With a simple note attached saying 'Until you can walk into the diner again'. She tried to steal her heart against the fluttering it caused. It was such a sweet gesture, but then she remembered all the mornings before there upset, when she woke to a pot brewed just for her, and now that wasn't going to happen again.

She sent the bags back, with a simple note 'I'll make my own coffee thanks.' It said, but it didn't deter the Diner owner.

A week later, Luke came to the crap shack when he knew for sure she would be home. His hat in his hands, and looked at Lorelai, and she looked just as tired and sad as he did.

'I will get you to trust me again Lorelei.' Luke said and Lorelai scoffed at him.

Over the next few weeks, her jeep was fixed without asking, her porch railing was fortified. She was given wild flowers and daisies and all her favorites each day. People sent to the Inn for lunch sent by the local Diner owner, and even little notes that expressed his love for her appeared everywhere.

Rory laughed at it. 'It's sweet mom, isn't this what you would want?' Rory had said to her mother, and Lorelai just glared at her. The whole town was in on the scheme of Luke's.

Miss Patty seemed to be inspired by their 'epic love story.' Little girls and little boys dressed up in Lorelei and Luke wear, and they acted out some of the most famous of the Luke and Lorelai scenes that the town had been privy to.

Babette and Morey sang about the best of times and the worst of times. Taylor thought of different ways to create festivals that might remind Lorelai about how much she loved Luke.

And the worst assault was when April began to spend time with Lorelei. April would come and visit her, and ask her opinion on things. 'Do you think Freddie might like this Lorelai?' April had asked at first, and she couldn't deny April anything.

There was too much likeness between her daughter and Luke's daughter. It was funny, that at the beginning of the relationship, she worried that there wasn't enough to keep them together, they didn't have anything in common, and now they had everything, with daughters who were clones of each other.

When she remarked this to Sookie, her best friend just giggled. 'Fate sweetie, you were meant for each other, even your kids are alike.'

Lorelai felt manipulated. She felt used and abused and nowhere was safe anymore. Luke, forced upon, invaded her and worst of all, she felt that maybe she should just forgive and forget.

But every time she had pushed herself down, to make room for Luke's problems, when she wasn't even involved in it, was a wrong that had never been righted. He hadn't come and said he was sorry, he never told her why he had shut her out completely. He had somewhat explained to her when she forced him to explain, why she wasn't allowed near April.

She didn't buy it, or if she did, and if it was true, than she was a little more than hurt this time. It was a tough situation sure, but Luke had to learn it wasn't just about him. He was ok with Anna, he was ok with April, and he seemed to be ok with how it was revealed. Anna had hidden this child from him, and yet she was treated like the one who had did the wrong.

Each act that was done to make her forgive him, made her resent him even more. She was tired of being manipulated, and one late night when the new delivery of flowers and presents was thrust up on her, Lorelai burst.

She stood there, arm crossed and watch Luke place flowers and coffee and a tape of Cop Rocks was placed on the swing chair, that he had installed a few days before. The swing chair that she told him they needed before the world had shifted so much. The swing chair that had made him walk off in a huff, and now, it was ok to have.

'Stop.' Lorelai said and startled Luke. 'What?' He said, unsure of what she was going to do. 'You got to stop; you got to stop all of it. It's not fair.' Lorelei says and Luke still doesn't say anything.

'I was rejected and abused and undervalued. When it was going on, I was the monster in this, and you were the martyr and then you reject me, and I gave up, and now you think it's a good idea to maybe be in this again. I was all in Luke; I was so in, that we were one, but you, you were miles away. But I can't anymore. So stop, your hurting me.'

Even as Lorelai bared her soul to Luke, you wouldn't be able to tell. Her voice even, no normal Gilmore anger body language. However Luke, he was the one that was holding onto every word.

'I'm sorry.' Luke says after a few seconds, and waits for her to break. But she was different. Luke could once say that he knew her, but now, she was a stranger. 'That's it, your sorry. No explanations, nothing but your sorry. Well that's just too damn bad Luke.' Lorelei turned around and stalked back into the house.

Luke was on her toes, following her inside. He saw that whatever mark he left on the house, was gone. And that hurt him a little. 'I was stupid Lorelai, can you forgive me?' He said and she just kept on walking into Rory's room. Where she had been sleeping since she walked away.'

'Can I forgive you?' She said and threw down the flowers she had taken on the way inside. 'I can hardly look at you, and you now say your sorry. After almost three weeks of your gestures.' She spits.

Luke looks stricken but he persists. 'I'm sorry that I haven't said it before. I meant to, I just didn't know how to.' He said. Lorelai looks pained for a second and then her face-hardens. 'You didn't know how to say your sorry, you didn't know how to say I love you, you wouldn't even make plans, what can you do Luke.'

She doesn't wait for him to say anything, she just continues on. 'Why did you accept my proposal, or why didn't you tell me after you found out about April that you didn't want to marry me. Why did you let me carry on? Couldn't you see how happy I was? Fine, you were overwhelmed, but you could have said you needed help. I would have you know, but now, I can't anymore. You're on your own Luke. I don't want you in my life anymore, and hell, I hope you have fun with Anna.' She spits finally and she then notices the tears on her cheek.

Luke steps forward and she aches to go to him. 'I loved you, I needed time, I'm going to make it up to you.' He said, and she thought he hadn't heard a word she said. 'I don't want you Luke.' Lorelai yells louder this time and Luke steps forward again, and her body voluntarily moves toward him.

'You do, you dream about me, you think about me, and you can't help but love me. That's what happens between us. Admit it, you are right now thinking about me in all those dirty ways you loved to think about me.' Luke said and she sighed.

'Don't make me say it again. I don't know if I can say it again.' She whispered and he finally just grabbed her gently, and she fit into his arms perfectly. Soul mates always fit into each other's arms.

'Then don't. Forgive me, and I will make sure you feel how sorry I am until we die happy, and old and cranky together. You love me, and I will provide for you, and I will make sure my past mistakes, never resurface.'

Lorelei tries to push him away but he kept hold. Not in a violent way, loving almost. 'I love you Lorelai, I love everything about you, and even your unhealthy eating habits, and your talent at remembering everything most people forget.'

She whimpers and he takes this as a sign to continue. 'I was an ass, a stupid ass, I should have told you right after I knew about April, and I can't tell you why I didn't. I don't know why. I hide things, you know that. I am not used to sharing things with anyone. I am a loner, but you, you make me want to be around people. I don't want to be alone anymore.'

She could feel her resentment fade, and she held onto it, like it was her oxygen. 'You manipulated me. You put the whole town, everyone I know and love, into this scheme to get me to forgive you.' She said and he nodded. 'Yes I did, and it wasn't the brightest idea, but I'm not John Cusec here, I don't know what are good grand gestures, and what are bad gestures. You have to teach me this.'

'What do you expect me to do? I can't be what we were before the engagement, and I can't go back to being perpetually engaged. I want to be married; I want the white wedding dress and the church and all of those stupid little details I didn't care about before you. I want it all, and I want it soon. I can't wait anymore Luke. I know that a marriage won't fix anything, but that's what I want.'

Luke just gave her a satisfied smile. 'I have no problem with that.' But Lorelai wasn't done with her demands. 'I'm not done, I want to be involved, I want to have a relationship with your daughter, she must have a part in our family. I want her to have a room, and I want to be able to introduce her as my stepdaughter. We would have to be married before Anna would allow that anyway.' Lorelai finished with a mumble and Luke huffed.

'Oh don't worry about that issue, Anna told me what she told you, and I had a long conversation with her. I assured her that you were the super parent in the scenario.'

Luke kissed Lorelei. 'I want all of that, and I want Rory to feel the same thing. You know that she's important to me.' Luke said and Lorelei nodded numbly. 'I want you to kiss me all night long Luke. I want all of that, and I want to be happy, and I want you to be able to tell me things, to come to me when any other unknown children pop up.' She jokes, and Luke just glares at her.

'Hardy Har Lor.' He said and everything wasn't forgotten. It was still there, but they dealt with it together.

The day that Luke and Lorelei got married, the whole town was there. Everyone who had managed to help Luke in his 'gesture' was there, glad that even if they technically failed, it all worked out in their favor.

April was the flower girl, and Rory was the maid of honor and sparks flew between the best man and Rory. Jess always had Rory's heart after all.

Things weren't always smooth sailing, but what story of true soul mates, ever told a smooth no bumps story. It was always full of bumps.

DIRTY!

THE END!

For now….


End file.
